don't talk of love

how long can i be the rock?
don't talk of love
or death
or blood
because you distance me you push me away
i can't hear it because i recovered
and i don't want to start again

i should not be simultaneously a reason to die
and a reason to live
i should not have to gauge every reaction
watch you every second
plan every word i say to you
to have the right tone
the right meaning
you say you love me
but what does that mean?
i'm the girl who saved you
but this love is making me break you
and i wouldn't kiss you i would never kiss you
love turns sour and then what?
where are you?
without the one thing holding you together.
i can't keep pretending it's all okay
i can't keep talking you down
i can't force you
coerce you
blackmail you
into giving this up
but please
please god
don't jump