chocolate and incense

"how did my momma get in the toaster?"
"john, not bob."
"it's like wearing a rape me sign. rape me! rape me!"
"oh! joe! joe!"
"...milk and cereal..."
"you can't say dick. it's not romantic."
"pretend it's a penis. you want it inside you!"
"do you want to touch it?"
"stop! go that way!"

[setting: a campfire ring]
hof: look at where you're sitting -
me: i can't see where i'm sitting. i'm sitting on it.
hof: sarcasm will get you killed. as i was saying, pick up any garbage and dirt -
me: dirt? [i lean down, grab a handful of dirt.]
hof: you're going to die.
julia: well, we all are eventually.
hof: but i'm talking about right now, not eighty years from now.