i've always been cautious in love because i don't want to turn out like my parents. i don't want communication to go down the tubes and leave me out in the dark. i don't want to hurt someone i love. and yet in the process of trying not to hurt people or screw things up, i end up doing exactly the opposite. it's a lose-lose situation.

add to all that that i'm a shameless flirt and it's a disaster.

if you care...i don't want to hurt you. but it's hard to believe the things you say are really true because they're so good and i really don't want it to be one-sided, but at the same time i feel like if i say too much i'm just going to be clingy and silly so i'm going to shut up now. meh.

::sigh::

my sister is a bitch. she threatened to tell my parents i'd snogged autry just to try to keep me from being able to go to portland. she's a bitch for other reasons too, but whatever. i hate her so much.

blah. i want dreams to come true. i guess a few of mine from last night actually did. maybe there's hope yet. the last few days seem so incredible deja vu-ish somehow, but i don't know why. erblegh. wish i could figure it out.

hehe sara amuses me. weeeee.