so. i'm starting therapy, i don't know when. not sure how much faith i have that it will work, but maybe it'll help. i need someone to bitch at who can maybe figure out what's wrong. i have this urge to go talk to my mother and tell her what's goingon, if only so i can get out of things. but i don't want her to get worried about me and/or not let me do stuff.

sarah suggested i move out for a few weeks to get a break at least from them...i think that would help so much but i don't know where i'd go.

i've hid the safety pin. cutting free for...two hours?

i really thinking i'm cracking. pretty seriously. all the fucking stress and things i've tried to block out in my life and all the times i've tried to be tough have come around and bit me in the ass.